March 2, 2011 by Stacy McDonald
Soft and Feminine…
Perfect for that special anniversary or romantic get-away! You've never felt "softness" until you've worn one of these gowns!
I love soft, feminine clothes. But, sometimes it’s hard to find anything soft or feminine…or modest. That’s why I love browsing the catalogs of Soft Surroundings. Not too long ago, I had the chance to travel to St. Louis where they have a delicious little boutique filled with gorgeous bedding, skirts, dresses, blouses, perfumes, pillows, throws, you name it. I felt like Shirley Temple walking into her newly decorated princess suite! If only, I could have moved in!
Since I love their clothes so much, and since, on special occasions, my beloved has gifted me with choice nightgowns and skirts from this drool-worthy boutique, I decided that I would become an affiliate. As such, I’ve taken the liberty to share with you a few of my favorite wish-list items…so that you can drool too. :-)
I would LOVE to have this dreamy gown! ;-)
Don't let anyone catch you twirling in this skirt! Sooo soft and feminine!
A dreamy, 100% cotton, romantic gown is an heirloom-worthy find, with charming details like tonal embroidery, delicate pintucking, three-quarter length ruched sleeves and a double-flounce hem.
My VERY favorite denim skirt (yes, stretch knit side waist = COMFY!!)
Spring has sprung! I love the forgiving cut of this blouse!
This silk skirt is a little pricy, but so cute! It could be casual or dressy, depending upon the blouse!
This adorable summer bed jacket/robe is on sale for 60% off in their "Outlet" section!
Be sure to create a wish list you can pass on to your beloved. You never know…
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31 Responses to “Soft and Feminine…”
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They have some really pretty skirts. Unfortunately, even on sale they aren’t in my price range or size range. But I LOVE this one, http://www.softsurroundings.com/P/Cabo_Skirt/ :0) Love the bright cheery summery colors!
I know, Dawn! But, I will say, they sometimes have very good clearance deals – but they go FAST!
There is an adorable pajama set in their outlet store that was $64, and it’s now $24! The quality is excellent. You just have to hunt for the deals.
I agree with Dawn… some really pretty things. But even their sale prices were expensive…out of my price range too.
I LOVE Soft Surroundings. I’ve been shopping there for several years now! I wish I could afford some of the bedding! They had a set of bamboo pj’s last year that I wanted, but they were sold out pretty quickly, even before going on clearance.
Hello Stacy,
Just wanted to ask if you don’t think some of their tops are a little too revealing and tight fitting for Christian women?
I can’t get over that silk skirt! Do they have boutiques in the Dallas area? My husband would buy me presents, I think. : )
Yes, Melinda. Quite a few of their tops are not what I would consider modest. I can’t think of a single store that has an entire inventory of clothes I’d consider modest. :-) But Soft Surroundings seems to have a TON of long skirts, and almost everything is feminine.
Also, it’s almost impossible to find nice, long nightgowns that are still romantic and good quality. Even when I’m looking for a “romantic” gown just for hubby, I prefer long gowns (my preference), and they are hard to find. I love the one at the top of the post, and I noticed it comes in three different colors (though it’s not on sale yet). Hubby bought me a gorgeous nightgown from here once for a special weekend that was regularly $89.00 for $19.99! The only problem with waiting for sales is sometimes they sell out of your size (ask me how I know). :-)
Those surely are pretty clothes, Stacy. However, I am a little disappointed and turned off by this posting. Here is why. When I choose to spend time on a blog, I go to the ones at which I am used to finding hearty topics that apply to all Christian women. When you chose to be involved with promoting and selling essential oils, I thought that was a bit different than usual, but fine b/c the ideas about healthy living behind it are good things for all of us to strive for. But when it comes to clothing, being almost exclusively a thrift store shopper by necessity, the store you have linked to above is so far out of our price range that I couldn’t dream of presenting my beloved with a wish list b/c it would just be hurtful. Yes, even the majority of the clearance and sale items. It, to my mind, makes you seem a bit out of touch with many people to suggest such a clothing store to your (surely) wide range of readers.
Also, I don’t need suggestions on pricey clothing stores, and I don’t think many others do, either. Google works just fine for searching for that type of thing, especially since I found that the clothing featured were ones of a type that could be found a number of places.
I have been coming here for years, and I really do appreciate you and the godly way you treat very many topics that are important to Christian women, Stacy. I am sorry to write such a book about it about this posting, but I thought I should let you know how it seemed to me.
Hi Stacy,
How do you find buying longer skirts for yourself? I remember you saying that you were, ahem, vertically challenged, as I am. I can hardly ever buy a long skirt ’cause they scrape the ground when I wear them. I’m 5’1″.
Love the pictures, by the way.
Also, I find that one top can look revealling on one woman and not so on another, depending on build and cleavage. If I’m not sure I usually ask my husband what he thinks.
In Him
Meredith
Hi Lisa,
Thank you for sharing your thoughts. While I realize every post won’t benefit every woman, all the time, you are always free to skip the ones that don’t benefit you. This is a blog, not a paid for subscription to a magazine. I freely give my time to write on various topics. In addition, while you may not be interested in suggestions on where to find modest feminine clothes, many people are. I receive numerous requests for this information each month.
In fact, once I posted an entire post that simply included links to shops that were most likely to have modest, feminine clothes. I too shop at thrift stores. In fact, since moving to Illinois, my daughters and I have found a gold mine of good, quality, name brand clothing at our local Good Will (I never would have shopped there in Houston, as the quality wasn’t the same). Again, we do most of our shopping at thrift stores, ebay, and Good Will. However, before my husband went into the ministry full time, he was an executive in the oil and gas industry. Back then, he could have afforded to shop for me at Soft Surroundings. Everyone is in a different place – and that’s ok.
And, even if most can’t afford the normal prices, some may be able to shop clearance prices occasionally, or their husbands may want to bless them with a special occasion night gown. I’m not out of touch, Lisa. I realize SS is expensive. But I also realize not everyone is in the same situation. And anyone is free to skip the post.
I am a stay-at-home, homeschooling, pastor’s wife. My posts are 99% encouragement to the Christian wife and mother. While that will always be the focus of this blog, I don’t think there is anything wrong with creating an avenue for the possibility of extra income to help my husband support our family, without leaving my home or taking time away from my family to do it. Again, please feel free to skip posts like this.
Meredith – I hear you. Sometimes I can find “petite” skirts that fit great. Other times the skirt is simply longer on me than it would be on someone else. :-) And then other times I just have to skip the skirt, because hemming so often changes the “shape” of the skirt.
I did get a skirt once that was made out of a gauzy type of material, and, because of the fabric, I was able to simply cut off the bottom without hemming it. :-) It still would have looked better on someone taller, but it worked.
Yes, Stacy, I realize that I can skip posts that I don’t wish to read. (Although, I wouldn’t have known I wanted to skip this one unless I didn’t skip it b/c the prices are not right in the post.) And I have no quibble with you wanting to help out by creating an avenue for extra income–I absolutely didn’t say there was anything wrong with that.
I’m not meaning to sound snarky, just to the point.
No problem, Lisa. I’m glad you shared your thoughts, so I could clarify (which I hope I did).
Hi Stacy,
Although I have a great respect for you, I am a bit bothered by this post.
Not because of the prices because everyone is on a different level financially and probably many can afford it and would want to buy it, as for the rest of us, we just maturely realize that we either have to wait for a sale or shop somewhere else. No big deal.
What bothers me is the neck line of the shirts. I haven’t visited their website but have only seen the pictures you posted.
I understand the reasoning behind the romantic gowns, they are to be worn for our husband’s eyes only. But why did you post the picture of the yellow blouse and say you “love the forgiving cut”? Is this modest, showing the top part of our breasts?
I’m sure you’ve heard the phrase, “Give them an inch and they’ll take a mile.” By promoting blouses that show some shoulder (the purple shirt), that have a low v-cut (the white shirt shown with the silk skirt), and that partially show breasts (yellow), aren’t you giving your readers an “inch”? Are you not helping to “justify” immodesty? (Not that they get their dressing “rules” from you, but you are so greatly respected that some people will do whatever you do and dress however you suggest.)
Are these cuts showing propriety and modesty (1 Timothy 2:9)? Are they promoting chastity and discretion (Titus 2:5)?
Would we want our husbands to work in an office with women dressed in these blouses? Would we want our daughters wearing these blouses anywhere? I pity the young men in our churches.
Sometimes I like to visit sites like that just to get ideas for what is modest as well as fashionable. I have never been very good at determining what good fashion is. I tend to lean in the direction of simply being practical and classic. I fear at times that I look frumpy so these sites keep me away from that. Since I have been sewing alot more for my girls, I am gaining enough confidence in my skills to sew myself clothing. I get ideas from the websites and apply them to my patterns with small alterations. We also do alot of shopping at thrift stores and ebay. I always appreciate being led to different modest clothing websites though. Maybe one of these days I’ll be able to afford a brand new pretty skirt. I love pretty nightgowns. Thank you for sharing this site.
Hi Linda –
I was “promoting” the skirt, not the blouse. :-) And, not only can blouses (like the yellow one) look extremely different on different body types, but we use undershirts to make our lower cut blouses acceptable.
I think we all need to learn to use discretion on our own, and not take a photo or an outfit (or anything else) as a “rule” of what is modest or not.
If we’re creative with how we modify outfits, we will have a lot more clothing to choose from.
I adore the nightgowns! Thanks for sharing.
Hi Stacy~
Thank you for posting this! I think it is hard to find such pretty nightgowns. We shop the cheapest places too, but sometimes we find great bargains in even the most expensive stores! I have found times where I paid less in the store than I would have at Goodwill, much to my surprise! However, finding modest nightgowns that are so nice, is very hard to do.
We travel to St. Louis Children’s Hospital every few months, so this time, I intend to try to find that store! I love the skirts and will wait for those clearance signs ; )
I was wondering…do you think wearing a lace cami under your shirts is immodest because of the lace? There is some controversy over that. We always just put a t-shirt or cami under our shirts, as so many of them are questionable. I like the cut of the yellow shirt, but know that would require something underneath for me, and was just wondering if you feel that a lace cami peaking out from under a top like that is immodest or inappropriate.
Thanks for your excellent posts. Are there any essential oils that help with thyroid disease?
God’s blessings!
Wow, lots of you are sounding ridiculously legalistic – lace camisoles?? Quibbling over shirt necklines on a post that clearly promoted the SKIRTS??? I am kind of shocked – this is not really what Christian femininity needs, in my humble opinion. Yikes.
In response to Amanda…
I simply asked a casual question about wearing a lace camisole. There are varying opinions on them. I personally, would not judge someone who wore one, or who didn’t wear one. Just for the record, I was not “quibbling” over the shirts or wearing lace camisoles! Simply asking for someone else’s opinion and I do not see anything wrong with that!
Hi Joenne,
I know you in person, and I know you aren’t legalistic. :-) (And I love lace camisoles, as long as they hide my cleavage).
We all have to come to our own convictions- convictions that are consistent with the principles found in Scripture. The idea here is to love God and our neighbor by communicating chastity – by dressing in a way that points to Jesus, rather than to ourselves.
If you’re interested in the topic, you might want to read the 3 part series I wrote on Chastity HERE
And, Linda, the “forgiving cut” I was referring to was the loose fit around the waist – something I appreciate as a mom of many. And don’t worry – if I am ever able to purchase that cute yellow blouse, no part of my breasts will be exposed. ;-)
What beautiful gowns! I LOVE the first blue one, like a peaceful sky with clouds.
Dear Mrs Mac Donald, I am a 24yr old girl who has
appreciated your book Raising and some of
Your articles Esp on feminity and modesty.
I and a few other people were wondering
about what seems to be a change in seems if your
girls clothing. Have you as a family decided that
wearing pants is ok ? Just wondering as we had
Thought you believed skirts was more feminine
and modest , which we feel and it seems lots of
People suddenly change thoughts on this as
young ladies get older and we wonder why .
We’d appreciate your thoughts on this. Thank You.
May God bless you & your family
Dear “Young Lady”,
Let me begin by saying that I have never laid out any specific “rule” of modesty or femininity for anyone. I have repeatedly tried to present the beauty in the principles of both. Therefore, you should not look for rules where none exist (exemplified in your question, “Have you as a family decided wearing pants are OK?”).
Our goal is to communicate Christ by the way we dress and carry ourselves. We do not wear things that reveal or accentuate our private areas – specifically things that would draw a man’s eye to something he has no business looking at. This is done out of love for God, love for our brothers, love for their future or current wives, and for the purpose of accurately representing the purity of Christ. You may want to read THIS and THIS
We also try to communicate the fact that we embrace our femininity – that we love being women. We don’t want to communicate to others that we are tough or manly.
I’m not sure why you’re asking about jeans in particular, or why it matters what my daughters do. However, my daughters do wear jeans on occasion, but they do so modestly and in a feminine manner. If they wear jeans, they typically wear a very long tunic style blouse or flowy mini-dress over them.
Please don’t get caught up in the “only one style is modest” trap.
Thank you for this post! Long night gowns that are feminine are impossible to find. I’ll be bookmarking this site :o)
Hey Stacy,
Glory, these skirts are beautiful!! I particularly like the Suzette skirt, so very feminine. My husband would like it too. No ,i can’t afford it, but i will be keepin my eye out at thrift stores for similar ones :-). I do like finding sources and ideas for all things feminine. I am not naturally stylish so i am thankful when i can *see* something and understand what kinda goes with what and colors that look good together and such. Seems like there is more baby than bath water on this site and i enjoyed lookin at all the pretties.
Stacy we met at a Mother/Daughter last year in GA. I was and am thankful for your wisdom and bravery(lack of a better word)in encouraging ladies and girls towards Godliness. I realize you are not perfect (who in the world is) nor do i expect you to be. I am just thankful that in this world where so much goes against femininity and strong Biblical Womanhood you and others are willing to take a stand to encourage others. Even if we do not agree doctrinally or prefrences or convictions and so on and whatever, we have common ground in the Lord Jesus. Press on dear Lady, God is using you to bless and help others.
Dear Mrs MacDonald,
Thank you for your reply to my comment. I am sorry if you thought I was being “strict” or “critical” of what your family wears. Truly, it was just interest. My family does not set “rules” but have convictions from principles in the Bible, and would believe differently in regard to modesty/femininity with regard to wearing jeans/pants and it was just a surprise to see them wearing pants. (No offence meant) I didn’t mean style – there are lots of difference styles of skirts, dresses, blouses etc that can keep us individual etc. You asked “why it matters what my daughters do” …Again, please know it was not out of judgement. I /We have been blessed by your family and ministry through books/blogs etc and it was/is always an encouragement to see your daughters dressing so feminine and modest. Thank you and God bless you all.
Lots of pretty things in this post! I, too, love to see these sorts of posts/links. I use them for ideas-I do a good bit of sewing for myself since I am very tall. In fact, I have two of those denim skirts-although my pattern has a side zipper rather than elastic waist. Thanks for once again promoting femininity!
Somewhere in the comments section above you said that you have an earlier post with some suggested web sites to find some modest clothing. Would you mind posting a link to that post so that I could visit it. Thank you.
Here is one link that I think that many of your readers might appreciate – modest skirts – at modest prices: http://www.newcreationapparel.com/default.asp
I have never found a store where 100% of their merchandise is pretty, feminine, modest, great quality, at a great price. When I go to the Soft Surroundings site I am always thankful to find at least a few great skirt selections on sale once in a while.
Would you, or any of your readers, have some sites that they could recommend?
Oh! I just ordered the following swim suit: http://www.simply-modest.com/posecom/products.php?product=Pretty-Pink-Ladies-Swimsuit I cannot wait to get it in the mail.
Vivian Maddox
Hi Stacy,
I am reading your book, “Raising Maidens of Virtue” and am enjoying the read. I noted how you and your daughter took back a can of hairspray that said on the back of the can how it “made sexy hair.” Love it! :)
However, when looking at this post, above, I am disappointed. I see you advertise for “Soft Surroundings” and have pictures of tops with cleavage and rounded breasts above the neckline. There are also slacks advertised inside the pages, and you talk about dresses and skirts. I don’t understand a staunch belief over there and laxness over here.
Love the book, so far. I am in the beginning chapters.
PJ
Hi PJ,
We all need to learn discernment in what we purchase to wear. Soft Surroundings has a huge offering of beautiful, feminine, modest clothes. Yes, some of their items are not all that modest, and we avoid those. Other items may be modest on one woman, but not on another because of differing body shapes. We have to use discernment. Have you ever bought clothing at WalMart or Target? Sears or JCPenneys? If so, you know that they sometimes carry beautiful long skirts and modestly cut tops, as well as short shorts and bikinis! :-)
And, for the record, we can certainly use hairspray that is advertised with offensive verbiage, without sinning; I was simply making a point to my (then) young daughter and to my readers. Hope that helps.